I am still in love

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I dated this guy from June 2009 to August 2019. In August, before he was supposed to leave for school in another state, he called me on the phone and abruptly broke up with me. Needless to say, I was devestated for a few weeks. I eventually got over it. Then, in December of the same year (2019) he came home and we talke about it and he said that the reason he broke up with me was because he was not sure if he could be faithful with us being so far apart. He wanted to have fun in college without worrying about his girlfriend back home. I agreed that was the best thing for us. After that little discussion he went back to school and I went on with my life. I had not spoken to him since that time until last Friday. He just showed up at my door and said surprise! I was very happy to see him because if anything we were the best of friends. Anyway, he said that he wanted to be friends again and that he was back for the summer and he wanted to hang out. He said that he didn’t know anyone back home here anymore and that I was his only friend. Then he told me (in an unrealted conversation) that he didn’t want a girlfriend and that while in college he found out that he was not good at realtionships.

I then told him that I was still attracted to him and hoped that we could be friends, but if I found myself falling for him again I was going to have to end the friendship. He said that if I felt that way he was fine with that and would respect my wishes. We have been out twice in the last week and we flirt with each other a lot. I really want to be with him, but I do not want to jeopardize anything. He said that he was attracted to me also and that he didn’t want to scare me off. I don’t know what to do. I don’t want to seem like I am trying to force him to be with me but, on the other hand I think he wants to be with me. Should I talk to him about it or should I just leave it alone. I am so confused, I just want him and I to be together forever. Why did he even have to come back into my life, I was doing just fine without him!

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